Well that settles it

I was waiting for Volkswagen to reveal the new Beetle design, to see if I’d want to trade in my 2002 for something shiny and new.  I was on the verge of trading in last year, when I heard they were discontinuing the New Beetle in favor of developing a car with a “wider appeal”.

Apparently that’s German for: A car men will buy.

See the “original” New Beetle is considered a Chick Car.  Which is fine, seeing as how I’m a girl n’all. And yes, I have flowers in it, and a steering wheel cover with colorful peace symbols and flowers, too. It’s my Hippy Ride.

We kept both Beetles when we picked up the Santa Fe because when you have cars that get you 50 miles per gallon, and you commute 24 miles one way daily, well even I can do that math.

So I waited. I figured heck, it’ll still be the Beetle, right?  They’ve reintroduced the Bulli in Europe (that’s the Microbus us Americans) but so far it’s only in Europe, and it’s an all-electric engine (don’t get me started).

Well last night they made it official.

The New Beetle sucks.

I don’t like it, not one bit.  I think my sister finds it attractive – she might trade her ‘03 next year for one, I dunno. But I personally can’t stand it. It looks like Godzilla stomped on my car. The top is more flattened out, as if someone grabbed the ass of that thing and pulled, stretching it a bit out of shape.  It’s almost as if a Beetle and a PT Cruiser mated, and this is the outcome.

I dunno, maybe this design will appeal to men since that’s what they were going for. But you ask me, I don’t see anything wrong with having a Chick Car. Even marketing it as a Chick Car.  I mean, they have cars designed for and marketed toward Men all the time – they’re called Trucks.  The Scion is for Squares, the Escalade is for the Uber Rich who have only one child. They even have a car now for Hipster Hamsters.

What’s wrong with a Chick Car?

What’s wrong with saying “This car gets 50mpg in diesel, has the most headroom of any vehicle, a Turbo engine, incredible amounts of space, it’s fun to drive and yeah, it’s Cute!”

How do they market a pickup?  They put Marlboro men in one and drive around in the mud at construction sites, dropping wads of metal and dirt in the back and towing things. Doesn’t mean a woman can’t buy a pickup truck if she wants.

Whatevah!

That’s German for Phoey.

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