Diary of Madness Day 14

Last night we found another posting she could apply for. I had to tweak a cover letter to highlight some good experience she had several years ago that would make her look more attractive for this particular position, but we climbed back on the roller coaster. I spent the night drifting to sleep with visions of her having an interview and getting this job, and day dreaming of how happy a Christmas we could have if she’d get hired before the holidays.

Naturally, I know better, but I can’t help it. Neither of us can. Some days you get SO tired of feeling depressed, dejected and utterly ruined, you find yourself more than willing to grab hold of ANY distraction or glimmer of hope.

We were out to dinner last weekend, using a gift card she had from that bastard who let her go, having a cocktail on his dime – and a waitress we know stopped by our table to chat and catch up (we hadn’t been there in a while).  We told her our news, that my sister was again unemployed and trying to get health care coverage to continue her post-cancer care, and she told us her news – – seems the boyfriend she had all summer finally moved in, and life for her was looking rosy as hell. He was going to support her, she was going to be happy again after a long, dark time. Only, as he was between contract jobs for the Navy, and temporarily without medical insurance as he waited for the next assignment to start up, he winds up in the hospital with acute renal failure.

Now SHE is supporting HIM, waiting at two bars, being his girlfriend and nurse, and making payments on his $350,000 hospital bill.

All three of us realized we couldn’t recall the last Merry Christmas we’d had.

And still I sit here gingerly grasping this thin line of Hope that my sister will get an interview for this posting, and get the job.

Remember the last one I mentioned? How it was only a few miles from where I work, and it would be a perfect set up for winter carpooling?  Well this one’s even better. It’s two miles from our house. And it’s a government job, of sorts, working at our local VA Home and Care Facility. Excellent pay and benefits, and two miles away from home.

Naturally I can feel the hot breath of Fate as she laughs against the back of my neck – the bitch – but I need something to cling to, so I’m pulling my sweater up around the bare skin and not giving her the time of day.

The job closes on the 7th, only a one week posting and they’ll still probably get 400 applicants. But this will get us through the weekend still riding that wave of hope. At this stage in the ride, you grab at anything that gives you a happy weekend.


She returned from the employment office in a good mood – seems the recruiter not only liked her resume for this job, but he has another posting from October that hasn’t been filled, he feels she’s perfect for. He’d like to tweak her cover letter himself and send it to this job, so we now have slightly more hope.

And Fate could really use a breathmint.

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